What We Want To See
by pandorabox82
Summary: At the FBI Halloween party, Ashley decides that now is the time to make her move and claim the man of her dreams, despite all the rumors that say he's with another woman now. Will she be able to handle the outcome of what happens or will she still see only what she wants to?


She scanned the dance floor of the party, hoping to find a familiar face. Andi had hinted that since the BAU was all home, some of them might come had gotten her hopes up, wishing that Dave would make his appearance. She had heard gossip going around that he was dating Strauss, which made no sense, since he was such a lone wolf. And that woman was such a bitch.

Sighing, she picked up a flute of champagne and sipped at it, her eyes still searching. "I told you, Ash, he's going to come with Strauss on his arm. Ever since the BAU hired Alex Blake, they've been inseparable."

Ashley rolled her eyes as she looked over at Anderson. "What would you know? You're so busy sneaking off with Lynch these days."

Anderson just smirked at her. "He used to play the French horn in high school."

"So?"

"So, that makes him give incredible head. Oh, look, see, there they are." Anderson pointed over to the doorway where he stood. That same rush of desire filled the marrow of her bones and she bit her lip as she tried to get control.

"What are they dressed as?" she asked, trying to sound bored.

"I don't know. It looks sort of Roman. Maybe they're Antony and Cleopatra?"

Ashley shook her head. "No, she's not wearing a black wig." Downing the rest of her glass, she thrust it at the man and glared at him. "I need to work up my courage tonight. Keep an eye on them and me. When I give you the signal, distract Strauss. We'll see then how youth and beauty will always triumph over age."

Anderson just shook his head as she moved away from him. Ashley snorted under her breath. What did he know, anyway? He was gay, it wasn't like he knew anything about how feminine wiles worked. And she had wanted Dave ever since that case in Boston. She'd tried to control it, since he was technically he superior, but then she'd transferred out to work with Andi Swann. The move had been designed to give her more access to him, but instead it had only given her odd hours and even less time to try and be with him. And then the rumors had begun.

Well, tonight was going to change that, she was certain. She was in love with him, and Strauss would just have to deal with it. Ashley grabbed another drink, this time a glass of red wine, and stared out at the dance floor. A slow song had started playing, and she quickly zeroed in on the man she wanted. He was dancing with Strauss, and the woman was cuddled up close under his chin. When they turned to face her, Ashley saw a dreamy smile on Strauss's face, the look wiping decades off her face.

Ashley felt her heart clench a little at that expression, a small worm of doubt beginning to gnaw at her brain. She gulped down the wine, hoping to drown that worm with alcohol. Hurriedly, she grabbed a shot of tequila next, also throwing that back. The rapid succession of alcohol helped to make her feel relaxed and loose. At the start of the next upbeat song, she caught Anderson's eye, nodding to him.

Even from halfway across the room, she could see him roll his eyes before stalking over to the couple. With anticipation, she watched him tap Strauss's shoulder, cutting in on the pair. As he danced the woman away, Ashley sashayed over to Dave, intent on making him hers that evening. "Hello, Dave," she purred, hoping she sounded sexy and alluring.

"Oh, hi, Ashley."

The man was distracted, as if he couldn't be ten seconds without that harridan in his arms. Well, she was here to fix that, and she wrapped her arms around his waist. "Will you dance with me?" she asked as she plastered her body against his.

"For a few songs, I guess." He was tense and uncomfortable in her arms, and she frowned as she began to sway in time with the music.

"So, who are you dressed as?" She hoped the question would take his mind off whatever was occupying it, and it seemed to work, as he relaxed a little.

"We're Justinian and Theodora."

She wrinkled her brow in confusion, having never heard of the couple. "Who?"

"They were a pair of co-rulers of the Byzantine Empire. He changed the rules of the Empire so that he could be with her forever, since he loved her so, and she helped him keep his throne in the face of outside pressures. They loved and respected each other very deeply."

She nodded, feeling an odd stab of disappointment in her stomach. "No one is going to know who that is."

"Reid named us right off."

"Okay, that's Reid. He knows everything. The average person is not going to know who you are."

He shrugged. "We know who we are, and we know who we're going home with. Why are you dancing with me, Ashley? Why did you have Anderson separate us?"

The words tore away the veil of what she wanted to see happen that evening away from her. "I wanted to be alone with you. That's why I transferred, to get closer to you. You were supposed to be mine, not hers. What does she have, anyway?"

Ashley knew her words were bitter and full of spite, but dammit, her heart was breaking, and that woman was the cause of it all. "She has the key to my heart." His voice was tender, gentle, and Ashley wondered if she had ever had a chance with him, or if she had just been conflating things in her head. "Ash, you were infatuated with me, since I stood in as a father figure to you. Profiling 101 should have told you that."

"And you knew?"

"Yeah, kiddo. That's why I never encouraged anything. I enjoyed our time playing video games, I really did, because you did need someone to mentor you. But once you transferred into Swann's unit, you didn't need that guidance from me. Why do you think I never contacted you after that?"

"I just figured that you were really busy. The BAU has had a lot of cases lately."

"Ah, the naiveté of youth in action. You can only delude yourself for so long, Ashley. I'm sorry if that hurts you. Erin, she, well, we waited a long time to be together. We're both stubborn, foolishly so, and have pride a mile tall. A stupid argument broke us apart, sent her running into the arms of her ex, and then, life happened. The wheel has finally turned back in our favor, and this time I am not letting her go."

To her surprise, she felt tears pool in her eyes. "But why her?"

"And not you? I did the playboy thing when I was younger. It got old, fast." He reached up and wiped away a few tears from her cheek. "I have to get back to her now. She still doesn't trust herself at events like these. I hope you have a wonderful time tonight, Ashley. Find someone who will make you happy, okay?"

She tried to nod as he let go of her, scanning the room for his lover. As Ashley watched, he found her, standing on the edge of the crowd talking to Garcia. Then he was wrapping his arms around her, pulling her close. The kiss they shared was brief, but telling.

"Didn't I tell you it was hopeless, Ash?" Startled, she turned to look at Anderson, who was again smirking at her.

"A girl has to try."

"And we only see what we want to see. Now that your eyes are open to the next great love affair, what are you going to do?"

"I don't know, Anderson. How do you move on from a broken heart?" She linked arms with him, letting him lead her over to the snack table.

"Well, some people blindly screw the next person they set eyes on." He waggled his eyebrows at her and she giggled a little.

"I thought you were gay."

"Way to shove the binary on me, Ash. Have you never heard of Kinsey in all of your psychology classes?" She shrugged, the name sounding vaguely familiar. "He studied sex, a lot, and said that our sexuality is not a binary, an either or, but more of a spectrum. I happen to fall more or less in the center, desiring guys and girls."

"Oh, well, that explains a few things." She smiled up at him. "Perhaps we could take a turn on the dance floor. But I don't think I'll be going home with you. Lynch would kill my credit rating."

"No, that's Garcia's area of expertise. Lynch would be more likely to ruin your gaming history." She gasped in horror and Anderson laughed at her, wrapping his arm around her waist as they joined the dancing throng. Before long, he had danced them over to where Dave and Strauss were. Both were quietly singing along to the song, Strauss's head resting on his chest. It was apparent to Ashley that they had shut everyone and everything around them out of the little world that they had created.

"They really are lovely together, aren't they?" she whispered in Anderson's ear and felt him nod against her head. "I never stood a chance against a love like that." Sighing, she tightened her grip around her friend's waist, letting him lead her away to blend in with the crowd. Someday, she might be able to move on, someday she might be able to find the right man of her dreams. But tonight, tonight she had to get used to the idea that Dave would always belong with someone else and her childish dreams were coming to an end. And while it did hurt, knowing he was happy had lessened that sting somewhat. She supposed she should thank God for minor miracles. After all, at the moment it was all she had.


End file.
